Indecisiveness
by godersi la vita
Summary: "I couldn't help but let an unwanted feeling of sympathy rise up in me as I looked at the girl sleeping so soundly. Maybe it was the way she hugged her pillow to her chest like a child;or perhaps, it was because of the tears that had formed a wet spot where her head lay." The workings of Peter's mind as he realises that maybe, life wasn't what he thought it was. *Insurgent Spoiler*
1. Chapter 1

This is my first time writing a Divergent fanfiction. I hope you'll enjoy reading this :)

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I couldn't help but let an unwanted feeling of sympathy rise up in me as I looked at the girl sleeping so soundly. Maybe it was the way she hugged her pillow to her chest like a child; or perhaps, it was because of the tears that had formed a wet spot where her head lay. But either way, I felt sorry for having to deliver the news of her execution to her. I didn't like Tris, but contrary to what people thought, I didn't truly hate her to the extent that I wanted her to die either.

Besides, she had saved my life… the reason for which I still didn't understand. After all, I'd taunted her and dangled her over the chasm – they weren't the best reasons to save someone. In fact, I didn't get her thinking at all. For a Divergent with an aptitude for Erudite, she was rather illogical. But, I guessed that was what made her Divergent. _Why was I wasting his time thinking about her anyway?_

Sighing, I lightly tapped the girl's shoulder. She didn't stir.

"Stiff, get up." I poked her this time around.

I watched as she snapped awake with a start and rubbed her eyes – probably to wipe away the tears. I considered taunting her for a second, but decided that too unsympathetic, considering her current circumstances. I wasn't that unreasonable a person, after all. At least, not toward someone whom was about to die, or I owed. In this case, she fulfilled both conditions.

"What happened?" She asked, raising her gaze to meet mine.

"Your execution has been scheduled for tomorrow morning at eight o'clock." I delivered the message indifferently, decided that would be the best tone to adopt.

"My execution? But… she hasn't developed the right simulation yet; she couldn't possibly…" Tris started to speak.

"She said that she will continue the experiments on Tobias instead of you." I said, half expecting the girl to start crying or screaming.

To my surprise, Tris did neither as she simply replied, "Oh."

I had no qualms about saying that if it was myself in her position; I would never have done what she did. She simply sat quietly on the mattress, deep in thought, rocking it forward and backward. We both stayed silent. I had to say that she was taking her future extremely calmly. She probably thought of her death as a worthy sacrifice for the lives of all the other dauntless.

_How like a stiff. _

I would have made a scornful remark, but something about the way she reacted made me feel as if I couldn't bear to. Did she really deserve death? I ought to do something, didn't I? _After all, you owe her your life… _I sighed as the conversation I had with Caleb Prior rang in my head again.

"_Get to the point; you were never one for beating around the bush."_

"_Fine, I was wondering if you could help me with a plan I have to save my sister-"_

"_Why would I help you and get myself into trouble? Besides, you were spying against her."_

"_I- That's hard to explain. But rest assured that it's not for my sake, but for her's."_

"_And how does that make a difference?"_

"_She saved your life in the Amity compound, didn't she?"_

"_Get out of my way."_

"_Could you consider it?"_

"_I said-" _

"_You owe her your life…"_

"_Fine, I'll consider it. Now scram!"_

"I could have forgiven you, you know, for trying to kill me during initiation." She broke the silence with her quiet voice, bringing me back to the present. She continued, "I probably could have."

Though I would never admit it, the statement made me feel slightly better. But, I had no idea how to reply. I would never say thank you to a stiff like her, even if the situation warranted it. At any rate, I didn't need _her_ forgiveness, did I? It wasn't as if I had felt bad about it.

"I never asked you to," I settled for an honest, yet cold answer as I turned and began to leave. After all, I hadn't. It was a partial truth. Yet, I felt as if I should do or say something more. After all, Tris might be dead by this time tomorrow. If anything, she deserved to know how much time she had left. Fine, that would be how far I would go.

"It's 9.24," I muttered just loud enough for her to hear, before closing the door and walking away. I didn't want to see how she would respond to that.

Just erase any thoughts of her in your mind, I told myself. After all, it was no use beating myself up over anything. I'd already told her the time, hadn't I? _But she saved your life… What importance does knowing the time have compared to being able to live? _

Damn it, I hated the feeling of owing someone anything – especially when it concerned life and death matters… or stiffs. Especially _that_ stiff. I'd thought that everything would be even after she shot me in the simulation attack. But no, something had to happen again and of all people, _she_ had to save me. And the worst part was, it wasn't just from a simple bullet shot. It would have been a _fatal_ wound.

_Stupid conscience_; I grumbled to myself mentally as I walked down the hallway. I couldn't just stand by idly... The dauntless in me was getting slightly restless from all the inactivity. Besides, siding with the Erudite hadn't given me the kind of better conditions I thought it would bring. The grovelling in submission and answering to Jeanine's every beck-and-call it involved was starting to get on my nerves. Sighing, I decided there and then what to do. But, it would be for the sake of my own sanity, and the repayment of my debt. _Nothing more_. I couldn't let people think I was becoming _soft_ - God forbid that thought.

Checking to make sure no one was in the hallway, I knocked on the door to laboratory 3C impatiently. A few moments later, the sight of Caleb Prior greeted me with hope in his eyes. "I knew you weren't that heartless." He said by way of greeting, causing me to cringe inwardly. Hell, did her have to rub it in?

"Shut up," I said, hoping the Erudite wouldn't harp any more on the matter and torment my pride. "I'll listen to your plan first, before I commit to anything."

"All right, I'll tell you inside," Caleb nodded as he replied, inviting me in before hastily closing the door, "It's quite simple really, Jeanine trusts the both of us enough that we can manipulate the serum and the wiring respectively…"

As he continued to elaborate on the plan, I had to admit that it was quite plausible. And most importantly, I could push the blame on someone else if it came to the point I was discovered before we escaped.

"So… do you want to do it?" Caleb asked at the end of his little briefing.

Smiling wryly, I answered, "Consider me in."

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Well.. did you like it or hate it? Please tell me in a review! :)


	2. Chapter 2

I've finished the second chapter! :) This chapter is quite short, but I had to cut it here. Otherwise it would have become extremely long. I hope you enjoy this!

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The next morning, I watched Tris lace her fingers together and bow her head, as if she was making a prayer. She didn't even _think_ there would be a possibility of herself escaping, did she? No, she had accepted that execution was her destiny. I had no idea of what to think about that. Should I be disgusted that she wasn't even putting up a fight? I scowled – here was I risking myself to settle a debt toward a girl who didn't even value her _own_ _life_. But, it was too late for me to take back what I did yesterday. The swaps were done.

"It's time to go," I said, facing the back wall instead of Tris.

She stood anyway - without comment - and I walked with her down the hallway. I walked at a slow pace, repeating the steps of the plan in my head again. I couldn't get caught – I just _couldn't._ But, a few muffled shouts distracted me.

"I want to…her!" Tobias. "I…see her!" Of course, he didn't know that Tris wasn't going to die yet. Caleb would reveal that information to him later – and I was banking myself on the fact that Caleb really wanted to save Tris. Otherwise, I was dead meat.

"I can't speak to him one last time, can I?" Tris glanced at me for a moment. I could tell that she was fighting to keep her voice from trembling.

I sighed as I shook my head. Hell, how I wished I could just tell the girl right now that she wasn't going to die, if everything went according to plan. But, of course I couldn't. I really hoped she wasn't going to cry; I hated girls who did. "There's a window though, maybe if he sees you he'll finally shut up." I said with impatience in my voice.

I quickly took her down a large corridor, and gestured to the ceiling.

"Tris!" Tobias' voice was even louder here. I looked away, sighing again. I hoped I wasn't going to witness a soppy 'goodbye' of tears. Cringing at the thought, I began to make my way down to the main hallway, where I could at least think in peace. I fingered my gun gingerly and frowned. Caleb Prior had skimmed on the part about Tobias, except for saying that he would meet them in the middle of their escape. But, how was Caleb going to get to Tobias anyway? I would have to trust him on the fact – and I didn't like that.

"Thank you," Tris said softly as she joined me a minute or so later.

"Whatever," I said with a scowl on my face. I didn't get what it was with those people having to say please and thank you every few minutes. Additionally, I wasn't very fond of the fact that I'd just willingly helped Tris. That little goodbye hadn't been part of my repayment. "Let's just go."

The next hallway was filled with numbers of Dauntless Traitors – as they were often called. Their loud raucous noise irritated me, as I shouted, "Hey! Clear a path!"

The effects were instantaneous. Like that of a domino effect, they started to back against the wall, making a pathway for us to walk. Everyone began to quieten down, bowing their heads… perhaps in respect? I didn't know why. I let Tris walk in front of me as the people began to pound on the walls. The way they were solemn, yet noisy seemed to me like a ceremony or ritual. How ironic that she wasn't going to die then. At least, if we weren't discovered... Caleb had better not be a spy seeking out my true loyalties.

A few moments later, I watched, slightly impressed, as Tris opened the door to her execution chamber. The execution chamber was as I thought it would be – crowded with Erudite. It would have been similar to the Dauntless in the hallway if they weren't completely silent. I walked in behind Tris, my heart beginning to hammer in my chest. This was it – the time where I would either be discovered, or get away with everything. I watched as Tris lay herself down on the cold, hard meal table, without saying a word. She seemed completely serene.

I looked at Jeanine for a second, as she handed me the electrodes – the ones that were rigged. She hadn't discovered this, at least. I slipped an electrode beneath the collar of my shirt and pressed it to her chest, right above her heart. I hoped no one noticed my hands as they trembled for a moment, before I switched on the heart monitor. I exhaled with a small sigh of relief as Tris' fast and strong heartbeat rang out. It had worked. Now, as long as Jeanine didn't find anything strange about the serum, I would be fine.

I stepped back to allow Jeanine more space as she took out the syringe with the purple serum. I took a deep breath through instinct as she looked at it for a moment with a small frown. My heart nearly stopped in that second, before she bent down almost predatorily over Tris, and injected the serum into her neck. I almost smiled at the sight.

I didn't know what possessed me to do it, but I leaned forward and looked into Tris' eyes as Jeanine pressed the plunger down. For the first time, I saw fear and determination in her eyes. It seemed that she needed an extremely near-death encounter to value her life. Well, this time, it wasn't too late for her. "The serum will go into effect in one minute," I announced indifferently. But then, I said in a quieter voice, "Be brave, Tris."

Stepping back against the wall, I heaved another sigh of relief. The first part of the plan had worked. Now… it was just the escape left.

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A/N: I know that there's still no hint of romance at all, but I plan to take this slow... since I can't decide between Tobias and Peter. I seem to love them both equally ;) I hope you'll leave me a review? They make my day!


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry for not updating for a while! I was busy with Christmas preparations... I hope you like this :)

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I pushed Tris's eyelids over her eyes, trying to make her 'death' seem more believable. Her chest was still rising up and down, if you stared close enough to notice. Hopefully, she was smart enough to continue feigning death if Jeanine took her own sweet time in here. We had to get out before she decided to take a closer look.

"Take the body to the lab," Jeanine said indifferently, as if she hadn't just killed someone… Even if Tris didn't die, it was the thought that counted. But was I truly surprised? _Not at all_. "The autopsy is scheduled for this afternoon." She continued.

"All right," I replied in as nonchalant a tone as I could. I allowed myself a small smirk as I wheeled the table out of the room, amidst the mutters of the Erudite. Knowing them, they were probably discussing the way the death serum worked in the body. At least, that made them none the wiser to Tris's current condition.

I pushed the table slowly out of the room, heading toward the general direction of the labs. There was actually a shorter route to the meeting point, but just in case someone was following me, I couldn't look too suspicious. As we advanced into the hallway where the dauntless traitors had been though, I began to pick up my speed. Now that it was obvious no one was tailing me; my main priority was to find Tobias and then, get _out _of the compound, _fast_.

I stopped with a jolt as I entered my destination. I looked at Tris lying there so defencelessly for a moment… She definitely wouldn't have enough energy to walk for a while. God, I had to carry her, didn't i? Sighing, I slid my arms under her knees and shoulders, lifting her up. My arms nearly buckled from the sudden weight.

"For someone so small, you're _heavy_, stiff," I grumbled in a low voice. Throwing a quick glance to my sides to make sure that no one else was near; I punched in the code to open the door to the room where Tobias was in. The speed of the locked door opening was far too _slow_, I thought impatiently, fighting the urge to wrench it open. It had come to the stage where if I was caught, I would have to face the consequences. No more shifting the blame was possible here.

"What do-" Tobias's voice filled me with relief, for a moment. At least Caleb hadn't lied about his location, which probably meant he wasn't lying about anything else. Tobias looked at the girl in my arms, his eyes widening with worry, "Oh my God. Oh-"

"Spare me your blubbering, okay?" I tried not to roll my eyes as I said that; _those over reactive people_. I wondered what would have happened if Tris actually _did_ die. He'd probably have a fit and go on a shooting spree. I gave an explanation, "She's not dead; she's just paralyzed. It'll only last for about half a minute more. Now get ready to run."

Luckily, the guy wasn't slow. His eyes widened with understanding as he said, "Let me carry her."

"No," I shook my head. As much as I would have liked to get rid of the weight on my arms, I knew that Tobias was much better at fighting than me. "You're a better shot than I am. Take my gun, I'll carry her."

With slight reluctance, I pulled my gun out of its holster and passed it to Tobias. We looked at each other for a moment, before starting to run.

"Follow me," I muttered, not caring for the way the boy ran in front of me as if he knew the place better than I did. This proved to be the exact opposite as he continued running forward instead of turning toward the side corridor – a much faster route.

"Left!" I shouted to him, cursing my current situation. Tris was really quite heavy, and it was hard to battle my natural instinct of saving myself first. _For the sake of the stupid debt…_

"Hey, what-" A loud shout captured our attention. _A dauntless traitor_. I was about to shout at Tobias to shoot, but the loud bang emitted from the gun in his hand drowned out my shout.

Tobias was impertinent, but fast, I admitted grudgingly to myself. We continued running as if nothing had happened. The only change was that Tobias held the gun in his hand now, with the bullets completely loaded.

"Right!" I shouted suddenly, realising where I was. Tobias and I continued running down the corridor, when we ran into another two dauntless traitors. Tobias shot both of them in the blink of an eye and we were off again.

"Whoa," I mumbled subconsciously as I glanced at the hallway around me. There was no way we were going to make it to the back door like this. But… what other choice did I have? I looked with mild distaste at a passage in front of me. It would have to do, as much as I disliked dirt.

"Wait, stop here!" I shouted, pulling the door open with impatience. I was about to run through it after Tobias, when I felt a slight pressure.

"Careful!" Tris said hoarsely. I didn't bother to reply, but turned sideways to let her through. If she'd banged her head, she would have ended up with a concussion, which meant I would have to carry her for an even longer period of time. I nudged the door shut with my heel and watched it slam, with a wry smirk. At least we had made it out of the direct vicinity danger, for a while.

"Tris," I heard Tobias say, as he crouched near to where I had dropped Tris on the floor.

"Beatrice," She said.

He laughed weakly and began to kiss the girl. I fought the urge to roll my eyes again. What happened to the Stiffs' dislike of having public displays of affection? Of all times, did they have to have a bloody reunion _now_?!

I sighed, "Unless you want me to throw up all over you guys, you might want to save it for later."

The two of them immediately straightened up, though I noticed the boy gave me a dirty look. This time, I did roll my eyes.

"Where are we?" Tris asked. I threw her an appraising glance. She looked reasonably strong, considering she'd been paralysed just mere minutes ago. At least she was much easier to stand than Tobias.

"This is the trash incinerator," I said, slapping the square door as a way to vent a bit of my irritation. "I turned it off. It'll take us to the alley. And then your aim had better be perfect, Four, if you want to get out of the Erudite compound alive." I could not help but add a hint of a threat to my tone, as I said so.

"Don't concern yourself with my aim," The boy retorted. I considered punching him for a second. But that would be stupid of me, since he was the one carrying the gun. Like it or not, he was quite indispensable for now.

Clenching my teeth together, I took a deep breath to calm myself down. I opened the door to the incinerator, "Tris, you first."

She nodded, sliding one leg into the chute, before needing help with the second. I watched as the girl tumbled down the tube with a wince. I definitely didn't want to go down the same route, but I hadn't any other choice.

"Go ahead!" Tris's voice echoed from below. At least that meant she survived the fall.

I turned to meet Tobias's gaze for a moment. "You go first," He said indifferently, nudging his head toward the chute. I raised my eyebrows, though I complied anyway. He was probably afraid that it was a trap, and that I'd go back to the Erudite and tell on them. Well, at least I thought so. That would be my first suspicion if someone had rescued me for what seemed like no rhyme or reason. After all, those people probably never thought about debts. It must be all flowers and sunshine for those people.

I lifted myself into the tube without much difficulty, sliding both legs in at once. I took in a sharp breath due to a swooping sensation in my stomach. My speed slowed down for a moment, and I thought that it was the end. Unfortunately, my relief was quite short-lived as my back began to pound against the many rollers. I groaned as the side of my body hits the hard cement floor. The stinging impact leaved me trying to get up gingerly. I dragged myself to the side, hoping that the pain would quickly go away.

I took in the sight around me with some disgust. The metal floor was rusty in many places, and the whole place smelled like rotting garbage and ash.

"Don't say I never took you anywhere nice," I said to Tris, rubbing the bruise that must have formed on my sore hip.

"Wouldn't dream of it," She replied, with a small smirk.

A moment later, I watched with slight relish as the boy dropped to the floor, wincing. I smirked; that would be a little revenge for being so rude to me. Tris went forward, probably to hug the guy, as I walked across to the other side of the place and opened the exit.

Light immediately streamed into the incinerator, causing me to blink for a while, as I tried to get used to the brightness. I turned my head backward, only to see Tobias and Tris right behind me.

"Got that gun?" I asked Tobias, with some concern. If he lost that thing, I wouldn't hesitate to kill him.

"No," He replied, causing me to stiffen for a second, "I figured I would shoot the bullets out of my nostrils, so I left it upstairs."

"Oh, shut up." I pressed my lips together in a line with annoyance. He was seriously trying my patience. I almost regretted helping him already. I held another gun in front of me as I left the incinerator room and walked into a musty hallway. But what I was most interested in was the sign next to door that said EXIT. I couldn't help but allow myself a smile of triumph as I opened the door. We'd just successfully left the Erudite compound, thanks to _my_ quick thinking.

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A/N: Thanks for reading this... did you like it? The next chapter will probably be the last one that follows the book so closely... Please tell me what you think in a review! :D


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